101 Funny Things Meat Eaters Say to Vegans

If you are vegan, you probably heard the following statements and questions hundreds of times, along with countless funny excuses of why one shouldn’t go vegan. 

While you might find this list entertaining, it isn’t meant to offend anybody, but offer a venting outlet to one vegan, who just heard one of those statements, one too many times…

1. It’s the food chain

2. Where do you get your protein from, HA?

3. If we weren’t meant to eat animals then why are they so tasty?

4. Don’t you know that we’re omnivores?

5. Lions kill Zebras in the wild

6. Vegetables have feelings too you know

God said it
“Thou Shall Not Kill” does not come with a get out clause.

7. You kill ants when you walk

8. Each to their own

9. It’s natural, so there!

10. Everything in moderation

11. The animals have to die sometime

12. Cows will take over the planet if we don’t control them

13. Jesus ate fish

14. The Dalia Lama eats animals

15. You only live once

16. I knew a vegan once and he was sick

17. Vegans are extreme

18. Don’t tell me what to do

19. We’ve been doing it since the beginning of time

20. But worms eat our bodies when we die, so why is it OK for them?

https://web.archive.org/web/20211027194847if_/https://www.youtube.com/embed/lOdVW6RWG8o?rel=021. It’s the circle of life

22. Cows are stupid

23. You can’t save all the animals

24. You can’t save the world

25. Where do you get your B12?

26. You can’t eat plants all day

27. It’s not murder it’s slaughter

28. Vegan’s are sooooooo extreme

29. We can’t digest grass

30. It’s OK, they were bred for consumption

31. Soya is genetically modified

32. There’s not enough room on the planet to produce vegetables for everyone

33. I’m allergic to Tofu

34. Where do you get your Omega 3 from?

35. If you were in the jungle you’d kill an animal to stay alive

36. We’re predators

37. What if you killed a pig with your car, then it would be OK to eat it?

38. We’re animals

39. It’s great that you’re vegan, but I couldn’t do it.

40. Chickens won’t survive in the wild, releasing them is cruel

“Chickens won’t survive in the wild, releasing them is cruel”

41. Fish aren’t animals

42. You’re not vegan! Spiders crawl into your mouth when you sleep

43. Don’t eat the food’s food

44. Plants can feel pain

45. What about all the hungry kids in Africa?

46. What about all the child slaves in China?

47. You’re laptop has an ingredient in it that’s bad for the environment and you still use it

48. Is your belt vegan?, what about your wallet, aha!

49. We’re doing the animals a favour, nobody wants to be in those conditions

50. The legal definition of murder does not include animals, so it’s fine

51. I know you’re right, but I love meat

52. They would eat you if they could

53. I will never change

54. Going vegan doesn’t change anything

55. Well I only eat very little meat/ cheese/ eggs, none at all really

56. Foie gras: You can’t taste the cruelty

57. I know, I know,but you don’t think about that (in response to animal farming conditions)

Don't think
“I know, I know,but you don’t think about that” (in response to animal farming conditions)

58. In a survival situation I would stay alive because I can eat people

59. It’s wrong for children to throw stones at the ducks, but it’s perfectly fine to shoot them

60. We bless the animals before we eat them, so we appreciate their death

61. I’m grateful for the sacrifice the animal made for me

62. Humane slaughter is OK

63. It’s evolution man

64. Meat gave us big brains

65. What about Eskimos, they’d starve without meat!

66. Vegans are weak

67. Vegans are always tired

68. Vegans fart more

69. You’ll have weak bones

70. What do you eat, grass?

71. Hitler was a vegetarian

72. You kill vegetables

73. Why do you love animals but hate people?

74. Veganism is like religion

75. Vegans eat rabbit food

76. Tofu is disgusting

77. I tried going vegan once but I didn’t feel well

78. What do you do in the winter when vegetables don’t grow mmmmmm?

79. I’d rather eat meat and be happy then eat grass and be depressed!

80. You’re vegan, GREAT more for me, haha

Give up dairy
But I don’t want to give up dairy! Image: Shutterstock. Modification: TVW

81. The animals are happy in the farms

82. If you don’t milk the cows they’ll explode

83. Do you want one? oh I forgot you can’t eat that.

84. Vegans die as well you know

85. I couldn’t be vegan I want to taste “EVERYTHING”

86. I could never give up cheese

87. I’m totally against animal cruelty (as they eat a steak)

88. If we let the cows all live they will produce too much methane and poison the atmosphere

89. Wait, Gorillas are Vegan, I think you made a mistake!

90. Who would you rather save your sister or a cow?

91. You can’t build muscle on a vegan diet

92. Vegans are skinny

93. Some people HAVE to eat meat, it’s their blood type or something, that’s SCIENCE!

94. What else are the animals going to do?

95. It must be so awkward for you when you go out

96. Raising your kids vegan is child abuse

97. The animals don’t feel anything, they stun them and then slice their throats, it’s fine

98. Save animals eat a Vegan, LOL

99. You need meat for energy

100. I couldn’t go vegan, I tried tofu once and I didn’t like it

101. Vegan shmeegan, hahaha

I could go on, but you get the idea.

Hope you enjoyed my list. Well if you eat meat, this is your list! 

Have more statements and question that you are constantly asked? Add them to our list using the comments section below!

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